Shadow Work a time to transform, die, and be reborn
It’s the time of year to do what some call shadow work. Shadow work is taking a deeper look into ourselves and addressing what most want to bury deep down and try to forget about. It’s the time of year where there are shorter days and longer nights. We associate digging deeper within ourselves as being something dark because it brings up old hurts and past traumas for some. In reality this is a very good thing to do, shinning light into those dark places so as to clear out that negative and stagnant energy. To transform oneself is to let the old die and give way to the rebirth of a new person, a healed person. This is what shadow work does, it makes you face your darkness until that darkness has no affect on you. I myself have had to do this many times. As a Medium and healer myself I have come a long way in my shadow work. I’ve had to revisit things in my past and face them head on to be able to move forward and use my gifts to help others. My spiritual team have brought to my attention that I have had these experiences as to be able to help others who’ve experienced similar things. So that I can relate on that same level and have the compassion for them that I never received. I needed to revisit the past several times to heal from it. The more trauma the more times I needed to revisit it to truly heal from it. You will know when you’ve truly healed, by facing that trauma and having no reaction to it. You won’t feel saddened, or hurt, you won’t feel anything. Well maybe gratitude, because you will see how far you’ve come and grown from the person you used to be and how empowered you’ve become. . Only then can you move forward with a new light to bring to the world. A light for those that are in a dark place to see and find hope for themselves. So embrace the shadow work and let it help heal you in ways that you’ve only read about in others stories. Write a new chapter in your book of life and be proud of the work that you’ve dedicated to yourself, because you are what matters. You are here to heal yourself first. We are all here to learn lessons and become the best versions of ourselves. So I say to you embrace this time of year and do the shadow work. Face your past and heal from it now so that it doesn’t carry over into your future.
I’ve been doing readings for a while now and thought I had things worked out with spirit on how I received information. Well, they had other plans. I was giving a reading when all of a sudden it felt as if a spider was climbing my arm and bit me. I jumped and looked but there was no spider. Then in a flash it was shown to me that someone from my sitters family was bitten by a spider. So I asked, was their anyone bitten recently by a spider? She raised her arm to show that she in fact had been bitten by the spider. I thanked spirit for the information, but was confused as to why it was given in such a manner. I mean why bite me? Later that day I was doing a reading for a young lady that had lost her father. I too lost my father three and a half years ago. As I opened up for her reading, I saw my father standing with hers. I was overcome with emotion for a split second. Then in a flash my father showed me that she lost her father in a quick and unexpected accident. Then her father stepped forward and began to give his information that she needed to hear. She had just lost her father three weeks prior to a head on collision, he was a state trooper. He came through for her the same way he would have if he was still physically here and she needed that. This was a girl that still needed her daddy and I could so relate to her in that moment. The messages flowed like a fast moving river and I could feel it soothing her aching heart. It’s such a beautiful experience to see how these messages change people for the better when they get that validation that their loved one is still here just in a different way. Our departed loved ones are always trying to show us signs that they are here. We just have to slow down, be looking, and pay attention. Things have been changing for me lately in how I receive information. My father will bring through a loved one or my grandmother will bring through information during someone’s reading. They help me still in spirit the same way they did in life, and I’m forever grateful for that.
I was in the middle of a phone reading and began to get images of the person I was talking to sitting at her kitchen table with her husband listening to what was being said. As I was receiving these images I asked spirit to show me the house and as I did I was given a tour of the woman’s home. I began to tell her what I was seeing and she was shocked and said that I was describing the inside of her home. That would be the first time that I realized I could do a remote viewing. I would do this several more times without even trying. I also began receiving some different information in my readings, like people’s blood types or health issues, so I called up Pat Longo and we had a chat about that. She had me do what she called a body scan on her and after I did that she told me that I’m what they call a medical Intuitive. I have to admit I was shocked but also thought it was so cool, lol. After we had that chat I really began being pulled to energy work and healings. I had seen Charlie Goldsmith on tv and saw that he had a natural ability to heal people. I also knew that Pat Longo had healed herself from cancer twice with no medical assistance. So I began to offer my services as a healer as well. I like to think of my readings as an all over healing experience for the mind, body, and soul. I will do a body scan and if there is an issue, I’ll most likely pick up on it. I will also pick up on energy blocks that your body holds from past traumas and spirit will help me assist you in clearing that. If you don’t know much about Chakras, nows a good time to look that up and read about them. I think my next few entries may be me sharing a few experiences from my readings with permission of course. Everyone’s reading is different in its own way. I will say this now, in one of my readings I say everything that I get from spirit. Some are very shocked at what they bring through. I just want to remind you that I am a Psychic Medium and do get information about things going on in your life. So if you’re trying to connect with a departed loved one, looking for guidance, needing healing, or wanting to open up to a more spiritual life I’m your gal. Did I say already that I love my life and what I do? If not let me say I am living my dream and wouldn’t change it for anything.
In doing readings I have learned to just say what I get. Whatever comes is for my sitters highest good and is to help them heal from losing a loved one or to heal from past traumas they’ve experienced. Before every reading that I do I sit in prayer or meditation and ask that everything be brought through for my clients highest good and that will break any negative cycles they keep repeating. I’ve learned through readings that families carry cycles that will continue unless broken. I would never have learned about that had I filtered the information given to me my spirit in my readings. It’s a different world when I do readings. My clients want to know all that I get and hang on every word at times. Which is so different from my day to day life that I’ve lived. I truly found my calling in being a medium. In growing up and hearing spirit, I was always being told I talk too much. I was always told to be quiet and not say this or that. I now know the reason I talked too much as a kid was because in the quiet I heard what I didn’t want to hear, spirit. I don’t think anyone can imagine how freeing it is for me to just let go and say what comes in a reading. For me it’s such a freeing thing to just let it flow and give what comes. It’s as much a gift to me and it is my clients. I have had to filter myself for so long and for some who know me they read that and laugh. For if you know me, then you know I speak my mind pretty freely. But it’s what I’ve gotten from spirit my whole life that I’ve had to filter. The knowing of things and messages that some just aren’t open to hearing. Not everyone is as open to speaking to the dead as I am and that’s hard to remember at times. This is all to say I’m so incredibly thankful for my gift of Mediumship and yes I do look at it as a gift. I am so grateful to have it and don’t know what I would do without it now, that I have been able to embrace my true self. It’s such a freeing expression of eternal love and I’m privileged to have a front row seat in every show. I’m grateful to never have to filter myself for this is my life’s purpose, to speak the messages of healing over another.
So fast forward to adulthood and I’ve been through a lot. One pivotal moment being that we decided to go back to church. I had not been since I was a kid and that was just what I felt we needed as a family. I loved going to church! The ever constant people helping to hold you accountable for your actions made it all very black and white to me of how to be and live and get along with people. It brought me out of my house and into the community. I still do love my church that’s where I got my foundation with God from. I truly believe that without that relationship with God you can’t do this line of work. I have my own beliefs as to who and what God is and it’s not what I learned in church. I have no religion, I’m a spiritual person who believes in a higher power that is God. Anyway, that’s for another session. I would be at church or helping with CCD and someone could be talking to me and whatever was coming out of there mouth was not what I was hearing in my head. And at times they went against each other, which was confusing to me. There were some that at first I just couldn’t stand to be around, later I found out that it was because they had lots of spirit around them. I was in mass one day and it was time to be quiet and reflect and I was shocked that I heard someone speaking. So I opened my eyes to look around to see just who had the nerve to be talking during mass and to my surprise no ones mouth was moving. As I glanced around I heard the voice get louder and I’m looking at the lady on the end of the pew and I hear her voice but her mouth isn’t moving. I could hear everything she was praying about and I was shocked, scared, and a little tickled at what I was hearing, lol. That ladies and gentlemen was the beginning of my learning to feel a persons energy instead of listening to what was coming out of their mouth. It’s very true when they say, “I don’t need to hear you, I can feel you.” No truer words were ever said. I’ve used this my whole life as my guiding compass. Those first gut instincts have never let me down about a person. I learned a lot about my relationship with God in that building. I also learned that I carry that relationship with me everyday and everywhere I go. I’d like to take this time to thank those that helped me learn so much about God, love, life, trust, and betrayal. These were all lessons that helped push me to open up more to my gift and harness it and learn to control it. It’s a hard thing to hear a person tell you one thing but know that they mean the very opposite of that. I’ve been disappointed, and hurt many times pushing what I knew away because I didn’t want to believe it. I’ve since learned that lesson well and never go against what I feel from spirit. Spirit has no reason to lie. Never discredit your first gut instincts about a person.
So to follow up on my previous entry, I’ve been connecting with spirit since I was a young child. I always dreaded going to school but not because I didn’t like school. It was because being around so many people with so much going on was completely overwhelming to me. It was already hard to fit in with buck teeth and big eyes much less hearing things and voices that weren’t there. I would have so much anxiety as a child that I would make up illnesses to stay home from school. I should apologize for all the unnecessary doctor visits that my family had to pay for when I was kid, ha ha. My poor pediatrician never could figure out what was wrong with me. As a kid my favorite place to be was outside! I just loved the smell of dirt and the freedom of being able to be me, just myself. Looking back on those times I was so comfortable because I wasn’t alone, I had spirit with me always. I would always get into stuff that I just knew how to do but shouldn’t be doing because I was so young. I was connecting with my relatives that had passed and if I wanted to do something, they would help me out and tell me how to do it. Only my child mind interpreted those messages wrong sometimes, lol. As a medium everything we get from spirit is up for interpretation so as a kid I didn’t have all of that figured out just yet. I always thought that I just had a very vivid imagination. I sure do miss those days of playing outside all day with my sister, they were the best times of my life. My parents separated when I was young so that added to my anxieties as it put around more people and situations where I would get things about people and not understand why I would know the things that I did. My teen years were crazy, to say the least. Mediums are also Empathic and looking back on things that happened I do believe my gift played a part in some difficult situations. It was my mother, my sister and I in one house and we were three very strong minded women that all were always right, lol. So as you can imagine that didn’t go to smoothly. My poor mother being a Virgo, my sister a Leo, and myself a Capricorn, no one wanted to back down from anything. I definitely have some fun and crazy memories from those teen years. The one thing that stands out about all of this is that I could always tell how a person truly felt no matter what they said or the facial expressions, I knew the truth. I used this to my advantage a lot as a kid. As I stated in the previous blog my grandmother watched my sister and I everyday after school and during the summer. I would always know when something was wrong. This was one thing that I didn’t like the feeling of, and still don’t quite honestly. That feeling would teach me things later as an adult, but I’ll tell you more about that later.
So I’ve decided to start this blog to tell my story of how I began to connect with spirit. But what is crazy is that I didn’t just “start” to connect with spirit, I’ve come to realize that I’ve been doing this my whole life. I just didn’t realize what I was doing. When I was a child my grandmother watched my sister and I while my mother worked. She would sit on the phone for hours talking in french to her family and friends about things that I had no idea what she was saying. The funny thing was that the whole time that I would sit and listen to her talk, I could picture these people that I didn’t know in my mind. They were happy people showing me food that they would cook or how they would raise cows and chickens, to me they seemed real old. I mean I was maybe 5 or 6 when this was happening. This kind of stuff would happen all the time, at family gatherings, and sometimes out at the grocery store. My mother would be pushing a basket around with my sister and I riding under it and we would pass an older lady and I could see in my mind an old man with her. I know now looking back, it was her husband in spirit. This to me was normal and I thought it was just my imagination. This all was ok until my sister and I would start to see things and hear things in our toy room. I gotta tell ya, during the day that toy room was a blast! We had toys from wall to wall, but at night that room took on a totally different feel. That toy room scared the hell out of us and there was nothing we could do about it since you had to go through that room to get to our mothers room. We would see shadows that were darker than the dark moving in there. We would hear movement, whispers, and footsteps. Every night I would wake up to my sister jumping from her bed to mine to hide behind me under the covers. This is just a few things that happened in the beginning that I can think back and remember. I’m sure there is so much more but I think this is a good start for now. I ill forever carry those memories of feeling petrified to move for fear of what might get us in the night. I would close my eyes and envision an angel at the head of my bed and she would spread her wings around me and my sister and wrap us in white light and that’s how I fell asleep every night as a child. Yes, angels are real and they are a big part of my life and story, as you will see later.